Blog Steps to Deal with people talking behind your back

Steps to Deal with people talking behind your back

Steps to Deal with people talking behind your back

Steps to Deal with people talking behind your back

“Be glad that someone talks behind your back, it means you’re far ahead of them!”

How do you react when you feel that people are talking behind your back? It is an awful feeling and not at all pleasant to deal with, no matter the people talking behind your back are your friends, or your co-workers. However, you do have choices, from not reacting and ignoring it, to trying to confront the gossiping person. All of it is dependent upon on the context and how you respond to the person who has been talking behind your back.

  • Being sure that the gossip is about you: - Assuming that you are the target of the gossip among your peers or colleagues would not be the best thing to do. You could go chasing around trying to confront the suspect, only to find out that the gossip had nothing to do with you in the first place. Don’t trust a rumor is about you unless you are certain about it, or you have caught the gossiper red handed yourself. Without any proof or evidence, it would be wrong to judge whether someone has been gossiping about you behind your back.
  • Talk about it to people who care: – Knowing that people are discussing you behind your back can be frustrating and depressing. Talk about it to the people you trust, your friends or colleagues who you feel care about what you’re going through. But be vary of whom you open up to, the person could be more inclined towards the person who is spreading the gossip. Try explaining yourself to your confidants and they will surely defend you and disregard any rumor they hear about you.


  • Choose to ignore the gossiper: – The best thing you can do when you are being talked about is not overreact, which though is not easy, always helps. Whether or not you wish to confront the person who has been talking behind your back, keep your calm and be laid back. Realizing what motivates the gossiper to talk about you is half the victory. All you have to do is change that, you would end the source of the gossip and hence end it altogether.
  • Resolve by Confrontation: – Sometimes the gossip get out of hand, and ignoring just won’t do. The only thing you can do is confront the person, but yet do it with complete calmness and speak in control. Having people to back you up, or evidence to prove that the suspect have been gossiping you is what you should worry about before confronting them. Be casual in letting them know that you are aware of them talking behind your back, in most cases a subtle gesture is enough to end it.

 Sometimes when the subtlety is out of question, being straightforward and letting the person know that you resent that they gossip about you, is your best option. If the suspect tends to make any excuses, just shrug off; let them know that back biting is not appreciated.

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